Q: I feel like my life has been ruined because of the deep hurt that someone caused me. What can I do to get over the pain, hurt, and resentment I feel?
A: Someone has said, “Forgiveness is the key that unlocks the door of resentment and the handcuffs of hate. It is the power that breaks the chains of bitterness and the shackles of selfishness.”
If you want to get rid of your resentment and bitterness, the first step is to forgive—and to truly forgive someone, you have to let go of whatever it is you are harboring in your heart against that person. That may be hard to do, but you can’t say you forgive, but can never forget. If you continue to blame the other person, you become responsible for your own unhappiness. But once you are willing to lay it aside, Jesus can help you move on.
No matter what problems your bitterness or resentment may stem from, God’s love can be like a balm that heals the hurt. Even if you don’t understand exactly what the problem is between you and the other person, God’s love is the answer! Ask Him for His love in your heart toward that person, and it will give you a new start.
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Forgiveness Is the Key, but Love Is the Hand that Turns It
Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). It will also give you the grace and power to let things pass, to forgive others as Jesus has forgiven you (Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:13).
If you’ll just forget yourself and think more about others, if you’ll really try to help and pray for and love them, you’ll find that will solve almost all of your problems. If you get your mind off yourself and on others, you’ll find that this is what will bring you true happiness. Get your mind on Jesus, first of all, and then He’ll help you get it on your neighbor and love him as yourself (Matthew 22:37-40).
—David Brandt Berg
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